Your crafts as gifts

[martzy]

Have any of you been really annoyed by the reception your creations by family members?

I gave my niece a nativity for her birthday that I made. She said before that she liked it and wanted it. It's not like I gave her something she didn't want. I even gave her a second one that I thought she would like. If I sold both of them at a show, they would have cost about $40.

She ohhed and ahhed over the gift cards, cash, even the bread making supplies she got from her grandmother. When she opened mine, she said they were nice and put them aside. No one else gave her forty bucks worth of stuff. No one else put much time and effort into their gift.

It's like she looked at as being a free gift. Like I didn't have any money invested in since it wasn't bought. But it was bought. I bought the wood, the stain, the blades, the electricity, and I invested my very valuable time into making it.

It just really irks me that the gift doesn't seem to be appreciated. My wife makes up a list of my stuff that she wants to give away at Christmas, which is fine with me, but I keep telling her that people in the family don't want my stuff. They want something store bought instead.

[wood-n-things]

Some people can be insensitive. We need to remember it is the spirit of the giving in which we get good feelings not the spirit of the recipient....Sorry this happened to you.

[rippersmom]

Keith,

That's a shame that your neice didn't show proper appreciation for your gift.

I stopped giving store bought gifts 3 years ago and all the family members are gifted with our handmade items. I told them I was tired of buying the same old stuff and things were just too expensive and from now on, they will receive gifts made with love, from our workshop. The cost is still significant, but we certainly enjoy making the gifts and can now avoid the misery of crowded stores and traffic. Shipping is expensive, too.

Don't stop giving your handcrafted items because of one sour apple.

When I sent some baby clothes for my granddaughter's baby shower, she was disappointed because I DIDN'T send a wood creation! LOL After the baby was born, I sent her an Intarsia Teddy Bear from a Judy Gale Roberts pattern, that she hung over the crib.

Hang in there
Merry Christmas
Nancy in AZ

[shadowfx97]

"It's like she looked at [it] as if..."

It's difficult to respond to your post without knowing your neice or your relationship with her. We all want oohs and ahs for our work; perhaps she thought that saying she liked your work and that she would like the piece as her Christmas present would be enough. Perhaps she's as insensitive as you think she is. Nevertheless, it would be a mistake to generalize about the family's feelings about your work from her reaction to your gift. Remember also that she knew in advance that she was getting this gift; surprised delight might have been too much to expect of her.

Whatever the truth about your niece, your wife thinks your work is nice enough to give as gifts; that means more than anything your niece did or didn't say or do.

[martzy]

Yeah. I know it's kind of Grinchy of me to feel that way. I know I gave her something quality that will last way longer than her gift card but she still bugs me. This is the same part of the family that threw fits and cried because we wanted to exchange names for Christmas instead of buying for everyone. I guess the more you spend on someone, the more you care about them. They make twice as much as the rest of us but still expect us to give them more and more useless junk at Christmas. They don't care what it is, as long as it's more stuff.

[rippersmom]

Yeah. I guess the more you spend on someone, the more you care about them. They make twice as much as the rest of us but still expect us to give them more and more useless junk at Christmas. They don't care what it is, as long as it's more stuff.

Ah hah, the materialistic ones will NEVER be satisfied. Quit trying to please them. Make your nice things, give them one or two, and don't feel guilty about it.

You can always get some wood from Home Depot, out of the cull bin and cut a bunch of simple things, stain them and wrap a bunch seperately so there are a LOT of them. ROTFLMAO

Nancy in AZ

[martzy]

Speaking of the cull bin at HD, I tried that the other day and one of the cashiers said that I would have to pay for everything by the foot. I protested and said that I've grabbed some chunks before and it was never a problem. I told them to keep them. There was no way I was paying by the foot for scraps.

[Bill Wilson]

That's rough Keith. I know that one of my greatest joys is the positive reactions I get from friends & family when I give them something I've hand made. I've never experienced a reaction quite like you got, but I'm pretty sure it would bum me out as well.

[Rolf]

Keith,
How old is your niece?
I have had my older sister down in my basement dump my scrolling scrap bucket on the floor and squabble about who gets what scrap because some of it looks cool.
I am very fortunate that my family and friends appreciate my gifts.
We send out an annual card with an ornament attached, everyone wants to know how to get on the list.

[rippersmom]

Speaking of the cull bin at HD, I tried that the other day and one of the cashiers said that I would have to pay for everything by the foot. I protested and said that I've grabbed some chunks before and it was never a problem. I told them to keep them. There was no way I was paying by the foot for scraps.

Sheesh, that's odd. The HDs here spray the ends of the cull pieces with black paint to identify it as cull wood. It's $ .51 a piece here in NW AZ.

New cashier, maybe??

[JimSawyer]

Yea..It can be painful.
I made a really intricate paisley clock for one of my best friends' B-day. It's been in a box ever since, somewhere in a closet. He told me he didn't want it ruined.........hungh??!
In that box is also an inlay of an Native American praying, a very intense piece.
His wife isn't too different, I made her a nice hand carved staff of Hermes. She never hung it up.
I must say that the portraiture I've done for him of A NA sitting by the fire, the Crown of thorns, (from SSW&C), and the Bob Marley all did make it to the wall.
But I am kind of hurt that my best stuff, (the inlay), is in a box somewhere.........

[jowshu98]

Sorry you were made to feel unappreciated. It is tough sometimes to please some. I have a couple of family members that can be this way. They drop hints that they like this or that but in the end it's all about the money. They don't realize or seem to care the amount of time and effort you individually put into something especially for them. You might be better off creating a price tag to leave on it. In my situation they get what they get and if they can't appreciate it or the thought behind so be it, it's just not worth the aggravation. Don't let it bother you and ruin the rest of your holiday.

[Catlyn]

Gosh, Keith, I wish I had an uncle who would give ME handmade things from his workshop.....
I had rather have something handmade anyday. Gifts like that mean so much more to me.....they are made with love and usually very few of them exist.
BUT.....there isn't anyone who gives ME handmade gifts but I have been known to give handmade gifts to others myself. And you're right.....they don't seem to appreciate it like they do junk from the store.
I look around my house and I have several items that I have made for myself.....I'd rather have those than buying a simlar one store-bought. I made my things...I know what it's made of....none of that pressed cardboard stuff and I know mine are put together good and will most likely outlast ME...unless the house burns down before I kick the bucket.
So I don't know why people can't appreciate the value in handmade items.
It's a shame.

Edited to add: I had made some things back when I was doing alot of woodcrafting on my bandsaw....I made the cutest little decorative table-top rocking horse.....the first one I made.....and my daughter-in-law wanted it soooo bad....oh, so bad, did she want it. Well I GAVE it to her.........she didn't keep that rocking horse til the water got hot. She got rid of it. I'm going to make some more, one for myself for sure....but she'll never get another one.
I also made a cute little wagon one time.....it was for DECORATION. It wasn't made to pile alot of heavy books in it. It was like to put a child's toy or maybe a stuffed rabbit in it. And she wanted that, too, and I gave it to her............she put so many heavy books in it it broke and they tossed it out.
She will never get anything else I make from my workshop.

[Croaker]

I have to go to rehab. So there are about 25 others there also.Twelve rehab days before xmas i start to give them ornaments for thier trees. Last year I cut all from poster nb\board and this year they all got wooden ones. They love them both and keep them from one year to the next. Now they ar palcing the poster board cut out is xmas cards so even their friends have them now,and I am selling the poster board ons for .10 each ( in stack cut ) so i have the wood and they have the paper. all is happy

[stephenD]

I know how you feel. Some of my family look at my work and slightly sneer. I quit showing it to them.
In fact I find it hard to know anymore if people are serious when they say they like something I have made. I'm just a sensitive fuzz ball.