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Halloween Jokes for kids - spread them around

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  • Halloween Jokes for kids - spread them around

    This list was pulled from a website but I don't think they'll mind me posting it here.
    Share it with your kids and wait for the groans!!!

    ************************************************** ******

    Why don't angry witches ride their brooms?
    They're afraid of flying off the handle


    Who won the skeleton beauty contest?
    No body


    What do skeletons say before they begin dining?
    Bone appetit !


    Where do baby ghosts go during the day?
    Dayscare centers


    Who did Frankenstein take to the prom?
    His ghoul friend


    What's a monster's favorite play?
    Romeo and Ghouliet


    What do witches put on their hair?
    Scare spray


    What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost?
    Bamboo


    What kind of mistakes do spooks make?
    Boo boos


    What kind of cereal do monsters eat?
    Ghost-Toasties


    What has webbed feet, feathers, fangs and goes quack-quack?
    Count Duckula


    What does Tweety Bird say on Halloween?
    Twick or Tweet


    Where do spooks water ski?
    On Lake Erie


    What happened to the guy who didn't pay his exorcist?
    He was repossessed


    What does a ghost eat for lunch?
    A BOO-logna sandwich


    Where do mummies go for a swim?
    To the dead sea


    What's the ratio of a pumpkin's circumference to its diameter?
    Pumpkin Pi


    Where do ghosts buy their food?
    At the ghost-ery store


    Where do ghosts mail their letters?
    At the ghost office


    What's a ghosts favorite ride at the carnival?
    The roller ghoster


    How do you mend a broken Jack-o-lantern?
    With a pumpkin patch


    When does a skeleton laugh?
    When something tickles his funny bone


    Why was the mummy so tense?
    He was all wound up


    Where did the goblin throw the football?
    Over the ghoul line


    What does a skeleton orders at a restaurant?
    Spare ribs


    What do goblins mail home while on vacation?
    Ghostcards


    What is a ghost's favorite party game?
    Hide-and-go-shriek


    What do baby ghosts wear on their feet?
    Boo-ties!


    What did the boy ghost say to the girl ghost?
    You look boo-tiful tonight


    What is a ghost favorite article of clothing?
    Boojeans


    What does a ghost put on his cereal in the morning?
    Boonanas and Booberries


    What kind of roads do ghosts haunt?
    Dead Ends


    Who did the ghost invite to his party?
    Anyone he could dig up!


    What is a monster's favorite food?
    Ghoul scout cookies


    What did the skeleton say while riding his Harley Davidson motorcycle?
    I'm bone to be wild!


    Why does Dracula consider himself a good artist?
    Because he likes to draw blood!


    When do gholes cook their victims?
    On Fry Day


    What's a vampire's favorite candy?
    A sucker


    What do you call a ghost with a broken leg?
    Hoblin Goblin

    What do goblins and ghosts drink when they're hot and thirsty on Halloween?
    Ghoul-aid!!!

    When does a ghost have breakfast?
    In the moaning.

    What do ghosts drink at breakfast?
    Coffee with scream and sugar.

    What do you call a witch who lives at the beach?
    A sand-witch

    What do ghosts eat for dinner?
    Spookgetti

    What's a ghosts favorite fruit?
    Booberries.

    What's a ghosts favorite desert?
    Boo-berry pie.

    Why do girl ghosts go on diets?
    So they can keep their ghoulish figures.

    Where does Count Dracula usually eat his lunch?
    At the casketeria.

    Why was the ghost such a messy eater?
    Because he was always a goblin.

    What tops off a ghost's ice cream sundae?
    Whipped scream.

    What is a Mummie's favorite type of music?
    Wrap!

    What song does Dracula hate?
    "You Are My Sunshine"

    What type of monster really loves dance music?
    The boogieman!

    Where does a ghost go on Saturday night?
    Anywhere where he can boo-gie.

    Why didn't the skeleton dance at the party?
    He had no body to dance with.

    What do ghosts say when something is really neat?
    Ghoul

    What kind of tie does a ghost wear to a formal party?
    A boo-tie.

    Why did the game warden arrest the ghost?
    He didn't have a haunting license.

    Where did the goblin throw the football?
    Over the ghoul line.

    What do you call a goblin who gets too close to a bonfire?
    A toasty ghosty.

    What kind of makeup do goblins wear?
    mas-scare-a

    Who was the most famous ghost detective?
    Sherlock Moans

    Which building does Dracula visit in New York?
    The Vampire State Building.

    Where do most werewolves live?
    Howllywood, California

    Where do most goblins live?
    North and South Scarolina

    What do you call a little monsters parents
    mummy and deady

    What do you get when you cross a black cat with a lemon.
    sour-puss

    What instrument do skellitens play?
    Trom-BONE

    Why did't the skelliten cross the road?
    He had no guts

    Why do vampires scare people?
    They are bored to death

    How can you tell a vampire likes baseball?
    Every night he turns into a bat.

    What's it like to be kissed by a vampire?
    It's a pain in the neck.

    How can you tell when a vampire has been in a bakery?
    All the jelly has been sucked out of the jelly doughnuts.

    How does a girl vampire flirt?
    She bats her eyes.

    Why doesn't anybody like Dracula?
    He has a bat temper.

    Who does Dracula get letters from?
    His fang club.

    Why did Dracula take cold medicine?
    To stop his coffin.

    How do you keep a monster from biting his nails?
    Give him screws.

    What can't you give the headless horseman?
    A headache

    Why did the headless horseman go into business?
    He wanted to get ahead in life.

    Where does a ghost go on vacation?
    Mali-boo.

    What do you call two witches living together?
    Broommates.

    What do you call a witch's garage?
    A broom closet.

    Why does a witch ride a broom?
    The Vacuum cleaner's poweer is cord it too short.

    What do they teach in witching school?
    Spelling.

    Why don't mummies take vacations?
    They're afraid they'll relax and unwind.

    Why do demons and ghouls hang out together?
    Because demons are a ghouls best friend

    Why did the ghost go into the bar?
    For the Boos

    What kind of dog does Dracula have?
    A Bloodhound

    What do you give a vampire with a cold?
    Coffin Drops!

    Why did the vampire quit the baseball team?
    They would only let him be BAT boy

    Why didn't Dracula get married?
    He never met a nice Ghoul

    Happy Halloween to all!
    Last edited by jim_mex; 10-31-2011, 11:27 AM.
    Jim in Mexico

    Logic will get you from A to B. Imagination will take you everywhere.
    - Albert Einstein

  • #2
    Cute...Groan.
    "Still Montana Mike"

    "Don't worry about old age--it doesn't last that long."
    Mike's Wood-n-Things LLC

    Comment


    • #3
      Jim, as we used to say to our friends; you're a cool ghoul on the way to school

      george
      A day without sawdust is a day without sunshine.
      George

      delta 650, hawk G426

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