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Okay, Here's Your Sign . . . .

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  • Okay, Here's Your Sign . . . .

    I handed the teller @ my bank a withdrawal slip for $400.00
    I said "May I have large bills, please"
    She looked at me and said "I'm sorry sir, all the bills are the same
    size."
    When I got up off the floor I explained it to her...

    ~~~~~~~~~~~

    When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick
    up our car we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to
    the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to
    unlock the driver side door. As I watched from the passenger side,
    I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was
    unlocked.

    'Hey,' I announced to the technician, 'it's open!'
    His reply: 'I know. I already got that side.'

    This was at the Ford dealership in Canton, MS

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    We had to have the garage door repaired.
    The Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did
    not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener. I thought for a minute,
    and said that we had the largest one Sears made at that time, a 1/2
    horsepower.

    He shook his head and said, 'Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower.' I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4. He said, 'NO, it's not. Four is larger than two.'

    We haven't used Sears repair since.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I
    gave the clerk a $5 bill. Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her a
    quarter.

    She said, 'you gave me too much money.' I said, 'Yes I know, but this
    way you can just give me a dollar bill back. She sighed and went to get the
    manager, he asked me to repeat my request. I did so, he handed me back the quarter, and said 'We're sorry but we could not do that kind of thing.'

    The clerk then proceeded to give me back $1 and 75 cents in change.

    New Rule: Do not confuse the clerks at McD's!
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco.
    She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.'
    He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg lettuce.

    -- From Kansas City

    ~~~~~~~~~~
    I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee
    asked, 'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?'
    To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?'
    He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'

    Happened in Birmingham , Ala.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~

    The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street.
    I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine.
    She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for?
    I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.
    Appalled, she responded, 'What on earth are blind people doing
    driving?!'

    She is a probation officer in Wichita, KS

    ~~~~~~~~~~~

    At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker who was leaving the
    company due to 'downsizing,' Our manager commented cheerfully,
    'This is fun. We should do this more often.
    I've Got A Lot More To Learn
    About Leaving Battlegrounds Alone
    "~~ Molly Venter

  • #2
    Some of those are truly scary.

    george
    A day without sawdust is a day without sunshine.
    George

    delta 650, hawk G426

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    • #3
      From personal experience as a computer tech/analyst, I could probably write a book! LOL

      Panic call: printer just stopped working, would not turn on, NOTHING! Big project, no printer, catastrophe!! Nancy to the rescue <drum roll>! Looked under the computer desk, bent down and plugged the printer back into the outlet. AMAZING!!! She fixed it!! <idiot clerk had kicked the plug out>

      Nancy in AZ
      A clean house is a sign of a broken scroll saw!

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      • #4
        I worked at a cab and limousine service in the mid '80's. One morning I went into the garage twice in the span of an hour. The secretary started complaining that it was cold in the office because I opened the door a couple times. I looked at the thermostat on the wall and found it had been turned down to 50 degrees by the night dispatcher. When I told the secretary about it, she said the thermostat had nothing to do with the temperature in the office.
        Here's yer sign!
        Fred


        There's a fine line between woodworking and insanity, I'm just not sure which side of the line I'm on!

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